Rachel Speaks

So moving. Rachel’s story continues…

Part Three

Rag Doll

By Rachel Young

“And then world moves on, but one thing’s for sure; Baby, I got mine, but you’ll all get yours.”- Taylor Swift

 The rest of 2009 and the whole year of 2010 felt like a personal hell after I was asked to leave my mom’s house. I moved in with my best friend’s family for the summer and they treated me as if I were their own. In the mean-time my sister, Wendy, moved into my room and painted the walls in Calvary colors (blue and purple).

I refused to talk to my mom for a month or two because I felt scorned; knowing that she had to kick me out made me feel like she cared about my siblings more than me. I wondered why they wanted me out so badly; I wasn’t a bad kid by any means, I just didn’t want to go to Calvary. I didn’t want to live my life in that “church” and feel like I was constantly suffocating.

After a few months, I finally answered my phone when my mom called me. Mom said she would be able to still take care of me in secret if I moved in with my grandparents in Fairfax City. Nana and Papa would take care of me and since she was still working in Fairfax at the time, she could stop by from time to time and go out to lunch with me without having to worry about CT people scrutinizing her. I felt like an ugly rag doll that was thrown in a closet, only to be brought out when they wanted me or when it was convenient. I agreed to move after my nana begged me to come live with her and help her around the house since she and Papa were getting older; she also promised me I would always have her homemade Indian food for dinner.

The fall of 2009 I moved in with my grandparents and started taking classes at Northern Virginia Community College. I was a nursing major at the time and was hoping that by taking all the classes I could would help me keep my mind off of my family problems. On the weekends, I would take my nana to Sterling and work at the Dulles Town Center Red Robin. After I got off work I would sleep at one of my other friend’s houses so I wouldn’t have to drive back and forth from Sterling to Fairfax. I finally decided to ask my mom if I could sneak in after I got off work and just sleep on the couch in the basement; she agreed and gave me my house key back.

One day after I had gotten off work I realized my house key was missing; I knew I hadn’t lost it because it was securely attached to my keychain ring and no other key had gone missing. I quickly realized it was Wendy who had stolen it. I called my mom and she let me in the house even though Wendy had not gone to bed yet. Wendy told me something along the lines of “Go back to Fairfax, we don’t want you here.” My sister had really gotten a God complex. I can’t remember how many keys she ended up stealing off my key ring over that year and a half, but I remember wondering what on earth were they teaching her at that “church”? What type of love is that? This is not what Jesus would have done.

The fall of 2010 is where changes began to start. My old 1997 minivan was falling apart and driving from Fairfax to Sterling a couple times every week was taking a toll on it. My mom agreed to help me out with buying a new car and she even went to the dealership with me. Between her and my papa I was able to buy a 2006 Toyota Corolla. I was ecstatic. I finally had a newer car with windows I didn’t have to crank up and down; I finally had a CD player too!

We drove my new car back to my mom’s house and she told me I could just park it in front of the house because no CTer would recognize it. My sister was more clever than that however, she instantly freaked out and called someone to let them know my mom had helped me buy a newer car. She packed up what she could and left the house. My mom made a few calls to some of her Christian friends from other churches and finally broke down about what had happened to her family. Aunt “S” had sold her a lie about what CT really was. They forced her to kick her daughter out because she didn’t want to live her life according to their “doctrine”. My mom promised me she would leave the “church” with my brother Evan.

The dream of my mom and Evan being free was finally coming true, but it didn’t last. While I was at work one day, Wendy came home and then there was a choice to be made once again. My mom went back on her word and I had to leave again unless I decided to change my life and go to Calvary. Once again, I packed my bags and left to go back to Fairfax. I had never been so confused and depressed in my life. I ended up going to my boyfriend’s dorm instead of my grandparent’s house and locked myself in his room for a week.

I had no idea where to go from there. I started thinking maybe it would be best for me to move out of the Northern Virginia area until I was done with school. In the spring of 2011 I had made up my mind to move down to Richmond by the summer so I could take classes at the community college there before transferring to VCU; I had decided the year before to switch from nursing to dental hygiene and VCU had an excellent program.

My bags were packed once again and I was ready to move on (at least that’s what I told myself). I had no idea what Richmond was going to be for me, but I was ready to be away from my family. Little did I know Richmond was going to have a huge part in me finally helping Mom and Evan.

To be continued

#exposecalvarytemple #RachelSpeaks #RagDoll #ForSuchATimeAsThis #Ezekiel34