At 10:00 AM Thursday morning, December 17, 2020, after an agonizingly much-too-long wait, the sentencing hearing for accused child sexual molester, rapist, and abuser Kevin O’Connor, finally commenced. O’Connor is now a convicted felon; a convicted child sexual molester in Loudoun County and the state of Virginia.
O’Connor did enter an Alford plea. For those of you who do not know what this is, in brief, an Alford plea is when the prosecution has enough evidence to convict the accused in a trial, but he or she is still asserting innocence. Keep in mind that in an Alford plea, a guilty verdict will be recorded, not the Alford.
This means that Kevin O’Connor is now a convicted felon, found guilty of child sexual abuse, and will remain so for the rest of his natural life.
He is required to register as a sex offender on the national database. He is required to attend Sex Offender Treatment, and must continue to attend until he admits what he did. In addition, he was given the strictest probation allowed by the court. If he is merely late for any one of his scheduled appointments, he will be taken straight to jail.
Chassadi Thompson, just one of Kevin O’Connor’s victims, has been, simply put, amazing. Yesterday’s sentencing was an almost two decade-long battle that Chassadi fought hard to secure. She has stood all of these years, never wavering. And yesterday was no exception. Chassadi remained strong, facing her molester in court. Although the public was not permitted to attend because of the Corona virus, she had her attorney, her victims advocate, and the stalwart LCSO Detective Bush.
I know that many will be disappointed that Kevin O’Connor will not serve any time in jail. Did I want him to go to jail? Of course, I did. So did Chassadi! But these cases can be difficult. Remember, Kevin O’Connor did not get off “Scott” free. He IS a convicted felon. We must keep in mind that this was between the victim and her legal team, and the accused with his. If Chassadi says that she won, then, I whole-heartedly agree. WE WON!!!
I spoke with Chassadi at great length yesterday following the proceedings. In a minute I am going to give the rest of this blog post to Chassadi’s own words. She has given me permission, and I am privileged to share them. First will be Chassadi’s summary of yesterday’s proceedings. I will follow with her Victim’s Impact Statement.
Chassadi’s impact statement is powerful. She carefully outlines the consequences that Kevin O’Connor’s purely selfish actions have had on her entire life – ever since those fateful encounters when she was just a little girl; a child. If anyone thinks that child sexual abuse isn’t a disgusting, permanently scarring, life-changing, and devilish act, Chassadi’s words will prove you wrong.
I have to say one more thing – Chassadi’s fight to bring pedophile Kevin O’Connor to justice was no small feat. This took courage and resilience on her part to come forward in the first place, and then to not let this die. Chassadi has been called every name in the book, including a liar and tale-bearer. She’s lost close family and friends, including her natural mother. Getting her justice has been an extremely long and difficult battle; a terribly painful winding, and sometimes very lonely road. Chassadi will credit Detective Bush for staying on the case, bringing it before the District Attorney and to a Grand Jury. As Chassadi said herself yesterday – there is now a chink in the Calvary Temple machine’s armor.
Yes, indeed. Bob Scott, you’re next.
Chassadi Thompson – you are remarkable! The floor is now yours. Bravo, my dear friend – BRAVO!
Chassadi’s Summary of the December 17, 2020 Sentencing Hearing:
SUMMARY TO MY COURT CASE: . TW: Sexual assault. Idk what else. I’m trynna be nice. Ok? . . . . . . . . . Ok, so he plead guilty by alford plea. Basically he pled guilty while maintaining that he is innocent. It got me a guaranteed guilty verdict. He has to register as a sex offender for life. The judge was pissed. She did not want to accept the plea because she believed he deserved a mental eval/sex offender eval and jail time… Tbh it really came down to my word vs his as there were very very few cooperative witnesses. The detective I worked with and his female partner are amazing people and worked above and beyond to take him down. (She retired a couple years ago to raise her 4 kids but still called and texted before and after the trial. He attended in person and was also the one who got to personally arrest my abuser.) There wasn’t much in the way of evidence (no seminal fluid or blood) AND almost 18 years have passed. Going to a jury would have been very risky, especially in that court system and jury pool. Anyways, I read my statement. Oof. It was hard. I did it. I looked at him in the eye several times throughout reading. I cried, had to stop a few times during but it was ok. I kept my voice strong and addressed him. It hurt a lot. It was an amazingly vulnerable and incredibly powerful moment. Im really really fucking proud of myself. I feel lighter, somehow? Smiled for the first time in days/weeks… months? Its still a lot to take in. To process. I’ve been fighting for this for almost 18 years… At the end of my statement the judge addressed him. She was disgusted and made that clear. She called him “a truly despicable person. The worst kind of predator.” She told him he was shameful. She specifically mentioned “child abuse” and “sex abuse.” She gave him a year per count, suspended, sex offender registry, sex offender treatment…but told him if he missed so much as an appointment for treatment then she would throw him in jail. (Its sex offender counseling. Basically counseling isn’t complete until he can admit what he did. Or that’s how I understood it.) So that’s the full story. Ask if you have questions. I’m probably gonna log off in a little while and will come back later. Thank you so much to those that have offered and extended your support, it has meant so much. Now I can be less of a sad bitch and get back to being a bad bitch.Chassadi Thompson, December 17, 2020, Personal Writings
Chassadi’s Victim Impact Statement:
Victim Impact Statement: Kevin Robert O’Connor CR-32658
How does someone fully explain the psychological damage that occurs when a child is sexually assaulted by their parental figure? I am being asked to describe to the court the profound lifelong emotional and physical impact being repeatedly raped orally by my parental figure has had on my life and all of those around me. Even in the writing of this, I am reliving wounds that have never healed. It has been nearly 18 years since I mustered the courage to tell someone what I was experiencing, and it is only through attempting to heal that I am still discovering ways in which this abuse has affected my life and the lives of those around me.
To really understand how deep the trauma sits, you must first understand the relationship between myself and Kevin O’Connor. While he is not my biological parent, Kevin O’Connor took upon himself the role of guardian, parental figure, and the title of “dad” when I was just 3 years old. He and his wife decided to raise my brother and I as their own children, and I sometimes wonder if he had my assault planned from the very beginning or if his mind became more corrupt and evil as time went on. When he CHOSE to bring me into his home and called me “daughter” he made an unspoken promise to protect me and keep me safe. Instead Kevin O’Connor made the decision to strip me of all innocence, trust, security, safety, and bodily autonomy in the pursuit of his own sexual pleasure and gratification. As he came to my room and took advantage of me night after night, my entire inner world and sense of self was destroyed. If that wasn’t enough damage, I had my entire life stripped from me, essentially being abandoned at a gas station with nothing but the clothes on my back and a paper bag containing a few maxi pads as a result of telling anyone what was happening to me.
Due to the nature of how Kevin O’Connor assaulted me, I have a lifelong problem with sleep and bouts of insomnia. Science has shown time and again how vital sleep is to one’s mental and physical health. I have also been diagnosed as having Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, Generalized Anxiety, and battled Substance Abuse for many years. I’d like to take a moment to explain how these various mental illnesses grew roots within the abuse I suffered and attempts to stop the pain continue to affect me to this day.
Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is how my therapists have described the ongoing flashbacks forcing me to relive the abuse in vivid detail, feelings of worthlessness, helplessness, and a deformation of the identity and sense of self. This has resulted in panic attacks when I see vehicles that look like the ones that Kevin and his wife owned during the time of my assault, seeing men who look or have physical mannerisms that remind me of Kevin O’Connor, being unable to sleep if men other than my partner are in the home, vivid and sleep disruptive nightmares, suicidal ideation, leaving me vulnerable to re-victimization due to attachment issues, emotional dysregulation, bouts of dissociation, poor impulse control, difficulty processing and regulating attention, as well as a disruption in understanding of bodily autonomy.
Borderline Personality Disorder is believed to be brought upon by prolonged or repeated traumatic events during the formative years. BPD can be characterized by a disturbed sense of identity, inability to weigh risky highly impulsive and reckless behavior commonly termed as splitting or black and white thinking, extreme reactions and efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, unstable or volatile interpersonal relationships, dissociation, intense or uncontrollable emotional reactions often out of proportion to the event, self harming or damaging behaviors, and depersonalization. Some have compared having Borderline Personality Disorder as being an “emotional burn victim” as we do not have a protective skin like coating over our emotions. Rather, they are raw and open and easily triggered. This has led to a lifetime difficulty of forming and maintaining close, meaningful bonds with other people both personally and professionally. In part due to my BPD I was unable to complete my college education, finding that the increased stress triggered intense dissociation and inability to cope. I battled self harm and suicidal thoughts and reacted with extreme emotion when overwhelmed.
I have attempted suicide mutliple times. Statistics show that around 70% of those diagnosed with BPD self harm or attempt suicide and 10% will complete suicide. That is a terrifying statistic and goes to show the immense pain that we go through as we navigate the world around us. I have had to learn and continue to learn how to cope and combat a lot of these feelings. Borderline Personality Disorder is a constant psychological war that takes place in my head.
My repeated trauma has impacted and characterized every relationship I have had to the point that I am unable to have meaningful, stable relationships. I have pushed away everyone I have ever cared about due to my fear of abandonment. I am unmarried and single because I cannot trust anyone for fear that they will harm me as soon as I allow myself to become vulnerable with them. My romantic relationships have been plagued with distrust and fear, often displayed as uncontrollable bouts of anger. My children have had to grow up witnessing me struggle to maintain control and learn, as an adult, to model healthy behavior even when I’m being torn apart emotionally. My sense of worth, torn and broken down, has allowed me to tolerate physical and emotional abusive behaviors thinking that it is better to have someone and be abused rather than relive the abandonment and aloneness I felt when I lost everything as a response to coming forward and reporting my abuse and assault.
I mentioned above that I also battled substance abuse and addiction for many years. Almost immediately after losing everything I owned, everyone I knew, and my entire support system, I was introduced to drugs, alcohol, and nicotine. I chased after the feeling of numbness that would allow me to forget, even temporarily, the memories of the sound of Kevin O’Connor’s voice in my ear telling me to open my mouth wider as he forced my jaws open so he could more comfortably orally rape me, of the feeling of his fingers penetrating my vagina and the roughness of his beard on my breast and nipples. I wanted to forget the intense shame that came along with my body’s involuntary and unwanted arousal response to having a foreign object shoved into my vaginal canal. I wanted to ignore the shame of being questioned by Child Protective Services and being unable to answer so many that they asked due to my lack of sexual education. I wished to erase the memory of being interrogated from 10pm to 5am in the offices at Calvary Temple and being surrounded by men in powerful positions leering at me and casting doubt on every word I said. I wanted to forget the shame of having to show one of their wives the bruise on my breast from where Kevin O’Connor had sucked too hard and finally left physical proof of my nightmare to show I was not creating this scenario in my head. I am incredibly proud of the fact that I can celebrate over a decade and a half of sobriety. That I have fought to become strong enough to face these thoughts and memories without the numbing effects of mind altering substances.
I can vividly remember praying every single night, during and for quite sometimes after the sexual assaults, that I would not wake up in the morning. I prayed and begged God to end my suffering in death and allow me to have some peace from the memories that tormented me. So many times I have wanted to stop fighting the thoughts in my head bad enough to end my own life and a few times I actually attempted to do so. To this day I don’t know that I truly understand the word “Happy.” I don’t know what feeling “safe” means and I envy the “normal” people who feel an emotion and are able to move past it without causing damage to themselves or their relationships with the people around them. I have had to relive these events, in detail, over and over again through every step of fighting for justice. I have fought almost 18 years for the justice that I deserved at 14 years old, attempting to right the wrongs of the multitude of adults that had failed me, the most culpable being this monster masquerading as a man named Kevin O’Connor.
I have spent almost 16 years in and out of therapy and taking a cocktail of psychiatric medications in an attempt to live a normal life. I have lost relationships with almost my entire Family of Origin. I have broken down more times than I care to admit. The damage that Kevin O’Connor caused to my life by valuing his temporary sexual gratification over my personhood has altered my life irreparably and continues to haunt my very existence. I pray that finally receiving the justice that I have been denied for nearly 2 decades will allow me to close the door on this chapter of my life and begin to truly heal as much as possible.
Thank you to the prosecution team, advocates that have worked on my behalf and the various law enforcement officers who have worked on this case over the years. I want to especially thank Detective Mark Bush for not only working tirelessly to help me receive justice but for also being a wonderful human being and never failing to answer any calls or questions I may have had over the years. Thank you for allowing my voice to be heard and my experience to be a part of this record permanently. Kevin O’Connor, I hope your actions haunt every moment of your existence and you feel shame and remorse for your despicable actions. You will face your God in judgement one day and we both know that you will have to answer for your actions.Chassadi Thompson, December 17, 2020, Loudoun County Courthouse Permanent Record
Chassadi, thank you again for your courage. I pray that your words and your fight will help other victims of child sexual abuse. My hope is that other victims will come forward, that they will be strengthened by your strength; will garner courage from your courage. That other pedophiles and molesters, specifically those who attend the Calvary Temple cult located in Sterling, VA, will be brought to justice alongside Kevin O’Connor.
Sterling community members, Loudoun County and all surrounding areas, there are child molesters out there. They disguise themselves as pastors, janitors, accountants, and “upstanding members of society” – BEWARE.
#exposecalvarytemple #KevinOConnorIsAConvictedFelon #KOChildMolester #BobScottYouAreNext #LoudounCountyBeware #ForSuchATimeAsThis #Ezekiel34